Things to Do in Portland with a 3.2-year-old

Things to Do With Dylan 


Jan 16-17 Great Train Show ( $9, kid free

Feb 20-21 KIDFEST ( $5, kid free




Mississippi Pizza

Playdate PDX

Posies Bakery & Cafe

Roseway Play Cafe – $3 for kid to play (all day)

INDOORS (with subsections)

Franz Bakery – free tour for 10+ people. School calendar hours.

Historic Belmont Firehouse – Open House Wed. 9-3.

Hollywood Dance Studio

Oaks Park – – kids’ morning skate

Mt Hood Community College Planetarium Shows –


Art. Art Drop In Studio 9-12. M-F. $7-10.

Open Studio for Kids. 10-1. F-Sa. $10.

Drop in. $12.


Mondays – 11:15 – Hollywood Library

Thursdays – 10:45 – N Portland Library (512 N Killingsworth St)

Friday – 11:15 – Gregory Heights Library


Children’s Museum


Oregon Maritime Museum

Oregon Rail Heritage Center

Ping Pong’s Pint Size Museum

Portland Police Historical Museum


A Children’s Place – Thursday – 10:30


Echo Theater Company

Ladybug Theater – closed? – Wednesday mornings for kids

Northwest Children’s Theater –

Oregon Children’s Theatre –

Tears of Joy Theatre –



Audubon Society of Portland –

Candy Ferry –

Columbia Gorge Sternwheeler –

Columbia Park/Imagination Station

Columbia Springs Environmental Education Center – – free

Crystal Springs Rhododendron Garden

Draper Girls County Farm

Flower Farmer

Grant Park (outdoor pool)

The Grotto – – free, $ for elevator upstairs

Heiser Farms

Jenkins Estate – – free

Mt Tabor Park

Oregon Zoo

Smith & Bybee Lakes Wetlands Natural Area –

Tyron Creek State Park –

Westmoreland Park

Willamette Shore Trolley –

Wooden Shoe Tulip Farm –


My Son in 1.5 Years Old, My Thoughts So Far

Before I get to some deep, meaningful, insanely profound thoughts on fatherhood that no man has ever had before, you may have noticed I haven’t posted much lately.

I add videos every one in a while to my Youtube page. View here.
Many of my Facebook thoughts are about Dylan. View here.
I attempt to keep my Twitter thoughts separate from Dylan. View here.

Now, on with the show.

My Son in 1.5 Years Old, My Thoughts So Far (As a Work-At-Home Parent)

  • I never imagined I would be eating so much bread crust.
  • I’m under the impression I am one of the greatest diaper changers of all time. I have only had poop end up in the wrong place twice. That’s 99.9% accuracy. I have long arms, huge hands, and living in a poop-free zone is my top priority.
  • I am sorry to everyone who didn’t ask about my son’s height or weight, but I told them anyway.
  • The number of people who openly tell me they are excited for my next kid to be awful (because Dylan is happy, eats well, and sleeps amazing) is comically high.
  • I get way too excited when my wife has changed the diaper pail, and the new dirty diaper easily slides in.
  • I am in the best shape of my life because I abuse the 24-Hour Fitness Kids’ Club. By my calculations, I’m paying $.55 an hour for the service.
  • I have had food go from Dylan’s mouth to my mouth, and vice-versa and I have never found this weird or disgusting. It would have repulsed me before he existed.
  • If you’re also a parent, and ask, “Do you think this is a phase…?” Please stop. You’re doing it wrong. Everything is a phrase. Everything.
  • Dylan mastered picking up his toys about five months ago, now he isn’t in the mood. This was my first realization that we wouldn’t always be evolving.
  • Dylan has asked for “more” when I’ve used the Snotsucker to clear out his noise, which is good, because I love doing it.
  • When we take a walk with the stroller, it’s 80% for me, 20% for him.
  • If you only take care of one child, and don’t have a part-time job, hobby, or side passion, I believe you are partially insane.
  • If you don’t have a dog, you need to get one. Mainly for cleaning up the food your child throws/drops/spills, but there are other positives as well.
  • There will be times when Dylan loves eating eggs, and also when eggs are the most disgusting food he could ever imagine, and as soon as they hit his mouth his only response is to spit them out. The time between these moments can be less than two minutes.
  • My child’s laugh and my child’s cry are my favorite/worst noises. I doubt this will ever change.
  • Because the majority of my parenting life is pretty darn good, I know I’m not supposed to talk about it, because it sounds like bragging. So far, I have no clue if I’m honoring that concept, but I am aware of it.
  • I worship Dylan more than I could imagine, but I worship my breaks away from him (his naps, sleeping, babysitters, film festivals, etc.) even more.
  • I have an amazing wife who is willing/able to be the bread-winner. She is also the hardest working parent I know of, constantly making sure she is involved in Dylan’s life. She’s given him 90% of his baths, and puts him down to bed the vast majority of time.
  • Besides my wife, the only one who can compliment my parenting skills and have it matter to me is my son. I will be very lucky if he does this within the next 30 years.

Dump the Truck

If you chant it, he’ll do it. Hence … “Dump the truck.”

This is just one of those things. One day, I told him to dump the truck. He did. Then he started applauding himself after successfully dumping said truck. (Recording before he was really walking).

He has a dump truck. He’s wearing a shirt that says “Dump Truck.” Enjoy.

Dylan Meets His First Radio Flyer

My parents wanted to get Dylan his first Radio Flyer for Christmas. I had no problem with this. Since he’s only 1.1 years old, they decided it didn’t matter when he technically received the gift. I agreed. (This video is recorded mainly for my parents).

Dylan woke from a nap, I hit record.

I dinged the bell a couple of times. I put Dylan on top of the Radio Flyer. I hit record.